06.18.2014 
Photoset-500}

thetsaritsa:

WE GOT BOOKS! WE’RE LEAVING TOMORROW! SEE YOU IN YOUR EAST COAST CITY SOON!!! thegreatcratsby and thetsaritsa bout to bout to

find all event info here!!!

https://www.facebook.com/events/1471726789705873/

https://www.facebook.com/events/1471726789705873/

https://www.facebook.com/events/1471726789705873/

please come!

READING IN BUSHWICK.

SHOW UP. (NEVER) GROW UP.

 04.29.2014 

In Snow - Jess Dutschmann

IN SNOW

You and I have been teetering on this mountain edge for a long time and you and I will continue to teeter here for a long time yet. The world falls apart around us. Underneath us our feet are stuck in weird plastic binding. Thank god we stole this snowboard. The Avalanche is coming. We are the Avalanche. When we turned into snow we lost our footing, flew down the mountain, built snowmen, melted snowmen. We got to a cave and you became a witch and you stood over a boiling pot. I turned to steam and you inhaled me and I became inside of you and learned everything.

 04.27.2014 

When Possible - Jess Dutschmann

When Possible

The snake in the road was dead.
When you picked it up it shook
its body shook like dance recitals.

It still and then calm and the also
having breathing. Imagine snake
lungs. In and out thumbnails.

There was a wrong snake. Green
and maybe teeth but not angry.
You picked it up it shook alive.

You killed the snake with your
hands and every day the snake
going killing again. You it killed.

Blood can coagulate did you know
but not this little guy. Just a vine
maybe teeth but not hungry dead.

 02.20.2014   02.9.2014 
beachsloth:

The 3000th Beach Sloth Post

                Where do I go from here? This whole thing began late in the summer of 2010. I was different then, blog-less. Since then the blog has expanded everywhere devouring everything. A few new social media presences have served as accessible ways of getting into my mind. My Twitter is an abridged version of my mind. Anybody who has grown tired of trolling through literally thousands of my blog posts can get a basic gist of what I’m all about on Twitter. 

                I plan on continuing the blog for the foreseeable future. I continue to meet fantastic people through my online work. Everything began on here, on this very blog, many years ago. Many of the people I started covering on this blog have gone on to do world tours, got book deals, houses, families, moved closer to that great old things commonly referred to as ‘life’. While those I cover have certainly improved I think I have too. By forcing myself to confront language and writing every day I feel my mind has grown sharper, I’ve become more observant. 

                The support I have gotten for my work has helped me through several moves, a trip to another continent, trips within the United States with more planned, and periods where I wondered what I was doing with my life. Recently I have felt really happy to have had the opportunity to meet my idols in person. Heck yeah I’m talking Cassandra Gillig, a true writer; I’m talking Jess Dutschmann, a cool kid indeed. Anybody from New Jersey is pretty chill in my book. I even got to meet Michael Seidlinger last year after talking with him online for the three previous years. 

                2014 is going to be a big year for me. Dig That Book Co. is putting out my first poetry collection “It doesn’t matter what you look like on the outside it’s what’s on the internet that counts” and it is going to look so good. I still have copies of my old collection “’I want to YouTube down the Rivers of America”, a collection I feel a large amount of pride about, which served as a nice introduction and helped me figure out how to do basic design work. I know as a fact that Dig That Book Co. will make my collection look better than a bunch of pages I printed off of a frequently abused printer/copier. 

                Guess I’m happy I lasted this long. Blogs typically do not go this hard or this long. I figure I’m lucky. Everything I’ve done on here has been carefully planned, scheduled, and honed down to an almost science. I have T-shirts, I have sold ads, and I plan on doing a lot more before I reach that next blogging milestone, the big 4,000. 

                Viewership is constant. My interactions have continued to increase. Snippets of me keep on appearing across the internet, often without my knowledge. An incredibly kind Luna Miguel, of Luna Miguel fame, managed to translate my haikus dedicated to my old dear former roommate. I plan on writing more about my former roommate too since he was an incredibly decent person. 

                Besides this I’m happy for my friends who are beginning to ‘make it’. I hope everyone who reads this little part of me continues to visit. Whoever wants to buy a T-shirt can do so here, whoever wants to buy a chapbook can do so here, or whoever wants to send money can send it via Paypal to: pleasepaybeachsloth@gmail.com. Or a simple little note can go a long way. I try to answer people’s emails or messages to me. I want to be here for people because people have done me the basic courtesy of being there for me. 

                Here’s hoping the next thousand will be even better!

beachsloth:

The 3000th Beach Sloth Post

                Where do I go from here? This whole thing began late in the summer of 2010. I was different then, blog-less. Since then the blog has expanded everywhere devouring everything. A few new social media presences have served as accessible ways of getting into my mind. My Twitter is an abridged version of my mind. Anybody who has grown tired of trolling through literally thousands of my blog posts can get a basic gist of what I’m all about on Twitter. 

                I plan on continuing the blog for the foreseeable future. I continue to meet fantastic people through my online work. Everything began on here, on this very blog, many years ago. Many of the people I started covering on this blog have gone on to do world tours, got book deals, houses, families, moved closer to that great old things commonly referred to as ‘life’. While those I cover have certainly improved I think I have too. By forcing myself to confront language and writing every day I feel my mind has grown sharper, I’ve become more observant. 

                The support I have gotten for my work has helped me through several moves, a trip to another continent, trips within the United States with more planned, and periods where I wondered what I was doing with my life. Recently I have felt really happy to have had the opportunity to meet my idols in person. Heck yeah I’m talking Cassandra Gillig, a true writer; I’m talking Jess Dutschmann, a cool kid indeed. Anybody from New Jersey is pretty chill in my book. I even got to meet Michael Seidlinger last year after talking with him online for the three previous years. 

                2014 is going to be a big year for me. Dig That Book Co. is putting out my first poetry collection “It doesn’t matter what you look like on the outside it’s what’s on the internet that counts” and it is going to look so good. I still have copies of my old collection “’I want to YouTube down the Rivers of America”, a collection I feel a large amount of pride about, which served as a nice introduction and helped me figure out how to do basic design work. I know as a fact that Dig That Book Co. will make my collection look better than a bunch of pages I printed off of a frequently abused printer/copier. 

                Guess I’m happy I lasted this long. Blogs typically do not go this hard or this long. I figure I’m lucky. Everything I’ve done on here has been carefully planned, scheduled, and honed down to an almost science. I have T-shirts, I have sold ads, and I plan on doing a lot more before I reach that next blogging milestone, the big 4,000. 

                Viewership is constant. My interactions have continued to increase. Snippets of me keep on appearing across the internet, often without my knowledge. An incredibly kind Luna Miguel, of Luna Miguel fame, managed to translate my haikus dedicated to my old dear former roommate. I plan on writing more about my former roommate too since he was an incredibly decent person. 

                Besides this I’m happy for my friends who are beginning to ‘make it’. I hope everyone who reads this little part of me continues to visit. Whoever wants to buy a T-shirt can do so here, whoever wants to buy a chapbook can do so here, or whoever wants to send money can send it via Paypal to: pleasepaybeachsloth@gmail.com. Or a simple little note can go a long way. I try to answer people’s emails or messages to me. I want to be here for people because people have done me the basic courtesy of being there for me. 

                Here’s hoping the next thousand will be even better!

 01.6.2014   01.2.2014   01.2.2014   01.2.2014   12.30.2013 
beachsloth:


The Beachies
                Welcome to the 3rd Annual Beachie awards. There were many great things that happened in Alt Lit in 2013. Some might say 2013 is the year Alt Lit got real. Of course I’m biased in saying such things but I believe in the power of online literature. Many of the writers in Alt Lit have graduated from the Internet into that peculiar thing, Real Life. Alt Lit started on the Internet but it has moved on to the New York Times, Vice Magazine, The Fader, Rolling Stone, and a plethora of other places where no Alt Lit has gone before. 

                I’m really proud of everyone in Alt Lit this year. I cannot believe the amount of success I’ve seen from so many individuals. At times it is confounding to think of how many of these writers began from lowly positions, with BlogSpots, Tumblrs, Twitters, Facebooks, and moved on. 2013 is the year Alt Lit moved away from the laptop light and into the sunlight. Finally exposed for the world to see Alt Lit has arrived and it only took tens of thousands of e-books, PDFs, tweets, Facebook statuses and other equally magnificent things. 

                Without further ado I present the winners of this year’s Beachies:

Best Collection of Xanga Entries – Andrew G. East – I used to have a Xanga until fairly recently. For a while I thought ‘damn Xanga is totally pointless’. I enjoyed reading Andrew G. East’s collection as it reminded me how far I’ve come since my Xanga days. Xanga was an art form and I was a little sad to see it go. 

Most Valuable Player (Male) – Stephen Michael McDowell – Alright I like Stephen Michael McDowell. The cat is out of the proverbial bag. I’m not putting the cat back into the bag because that is cruel. Cats need to be free to do what they want to do. In 2013 Stephen Michael McDowell’s output was ‘out of control’. Not only did Stephen Michael McDowell put out a novel and several chapbooks but he also had ‘Mammal’ that featured a lot of new writers. Overall Stephen Michael McDowell does fine work and ‘Mammal’ his metaphorical baby, is just getting started. 

Most Valuable Player (Female) – Jess Dutschmann – Jess Dutschmann’s output is pretty incredible. Her work is everywhere. I have reviewed her work in numerous places and am always pleasantly surprised with what I find. 2013 saw her continuously put lots of new material. I suggest her writing to basically anyone I meet who asks ‘Where is a good place to get into Alt Lit’. Please check anything of hers out especially her most recent work ‘Calamity’. 

Winner for Best Dog – Jack Serge – While Jack Serge continues to ‘do his do’ he won over countless fans for his accurate portrayal of an online dog. Jack Serge is way better than that stupid dog ‘Dog with a Blog’. I really dislike that ‘Dog with a Blog’ show because the dog barely even blogs. ‘Dog with a Blog’ mostly re-blogs stuff. That is not real blogging. Good thing Jack Serge came steaming into the Alt Lit community and is prepared to rock the community quite soon. 

Winner for best play – doriantightredpantsXX by Olivia Lilley – I wish I was able to see this in real life. Sadly I do not live in Chicago. I am a big fan of Olivia Lilley’s work and the little teaser video makes it look phenomenal. Anybody in the greater Chicago area ought to check out Olivia Lilley’s Parlor as she makes it quite an active event space. 

The Best Alt Lit Shitstorm – Josh Baines – Yes Alt Lit had quite a number of shitstorms this year. Some were worse than others. No storm was better than that wrought by a young Englishman named Josh Baines. Thanks to Josh Baines Alt Lit was official. Strangely Josh Baines even has a Facebook fan page called ‘Thank You Josh Baines’ dedicated to the event. Besides this Josh Baines also was prolifically ‘shit-talked’ by members of the Alt Lit community and their mothers. 

Of course this is by no means the end of the Beachies ceremony but only the beginning. Two more installments of the Beachies are forthcoming. 2013 was a busy year.

beachsloth:

The Beachies

                Welcome to the 3rd Annual Beachie awards. There were many great things that happened in Alt Lit in 2013. Some might say 2013 is the year Alt Lit got real. Of course I’m biased in saying such things but I believe in the power of online literature. Many of the writers in Alt Lit have graduated from the Internet into that peculiar thing, Real Life. Alt Lit started on the Internet but it has moved on to the New York Times, Vice Magazine, The Fader, Rolling Stone, and a plethora of other places where no Alt Lit has gone before. 

                I’m really proud of everyone in Alt Lit this year. I cannot believe the amount of success I’ve seen from so many individuals. At times it is confounding to think of how many of these writers began from lowly positions, with BlogSpots, Tumblrs, Twitters, Facebooks, and moved on. 2013 is the year Alt Lit moved away from the laptop light and into the sunlight. Finally exposed for the world to see Alt Lit has arrived and it only took tens of thousands of e-books, PDFs, tweets, Facebook statuses and other equally magnificent things. 

                Without further ado I present the winners of this year’s Beachies:

Best Collection of Xanga Entries – Andrew G. East – I used to have a Xanga until fairly recently. For a while I thought ‘damn Xanga is totally pointless’. I enjoyed reading Andrew G. East’s collection as it reminded me how far I’ve come since my Xanga days. Xanga was an art form and I was a little sad to see it go. 

Most Valuable Player (Male) – Stephen Michael McDowell – Alright I like Stephen Michael McDowell. The cat is out of the proverbial bag. I’m not putting the cat back into the bag because that is cruel. Cats need to be free to do what they want to do. In 2013 Stephen Michael McDowell’s output was ‘out of control’. Not only did Stephen Michael McDowell put out a novel and several chapbooks but he also had ‘Mammal’ that featured a lot of new writers. Overall Stephen Michael McDowell does fine work and ‘Mammal’ his metaphorical baby, is just getting started. 

Most Valuable Player (Female) – Jess Dutschmann – Jess Dutschmann’s output is pretty incredible. Her work is everywhere. I have reviewed her work in numerous places and am always pleasantly surprised with what I find. 2013 saw her continuously put lots of new material. I suggest her writing to basically anyone I meet who asks ‘Where is a good place to get into Alt Lit’. Please check anything of hers out especially her most recent work ‘Calamity’. 

Winner for Best Dog – Jack Serge – While Jack Serge continues to ‘do his do’ he won over countless fans for his accurate portrayal of an online dog. Jack Serge is way better than that stupid dog ‘Dog with a Blog’. I really dislike that ‘Dog with a Blog’ show because the dog barely even blogs. ‘Dog with a Blog’ mostly re-blogs stuff. That is not real blogging. Good thing Jack Serge came steaming into the Alt Lit community and is prepared to rock the community quite soon. 

Winner for best play – doriantightredpantsXX by Olivia Lilley – I wish I was able to see this in real life. Sadly I do not live in Chicago. I am a big fan of Olivia Lilley’s work and the little teaser video makes it look phenomenal. Anybody in the greater Chicago area ought to check out Olivia Lilley’s Parlor as she makes it quite an active event space. 

The Best Alt Lit Shitstorm – Josh Baines – Yes Alt Lit had quite a number of shitstorms this year. Some were worse than others. No storm was better than that wrought by a young Englishman named Josh Baines. Thanks to Josh Baines Alt Lit was official. Strangely Josh Baines even has a Facebook fan page called ‘Thank You Josh Baines’ dedicated to the event. Besides this Josh Baines also was prolifically ‘shit-talked’ by members of the Alt Lit community and their mothers. 

Of course this is by no means the end of the Beachies ceremony but only the beginning. Two more installments of the Beachies are forthcoming. 2013 was a busy year.

Impression theme by Hello New York.